Thursday, October 15, 2009

I'm not on a mission...

Okay, this is something that's been rolling around in my head off and on for months and months. I'm not sure it will come out right, but I'm going to try and share it anyways:


I caught just a few minutes of an Extreme Home Makeover re-run last night while on the treadmill flipping channels. I didn't really catch the whole story, but it appeared that a single mom had adopted or fostered a number of children with fairly extreme special needs (physical, mental, emotional...).
Anyways, she said something that really struck me. She said that people often ask her if she is on some sort of mission. And she said something along the lines of, "I'm not on a mission. I just found my children."


I love that.


On occasion, people act like we are something special, some sort of saints. Not much could be further from the truth. Just ask my kids! :o) But seriously though - the vast majority of people who adopt do so for primarily selfish reasons. We all want to add to our family and think this is the best way for us at this time. Mark and I are no different. After Ally was born, even though she was a tough baby, I knew I wanted more kids but I wasn't so sure I wanted to HAVE more kids. We'd talked about adoption over the years, but then we got serious. Because we had plans. We wanted a son, and hey, we've got a 5 year gap between the girls, so we could get a little toddler/preschool age boy to fit right in and we'd be all set!


Oh, we had good intentions, but looking back it was awful close to trying to order our perfect family out of a catalog. Fortunately for us, God laughs at plans. ;o) And our family developed from there, including two more daughters than I had anticipated!


People tell us quite often how lucky our kids are. And I suppose they are. They are warm and fed, have access to great schools, plenty of toys and are loved.


But so many people want to gloss over how lucky WE are. We are lucky because we found our children. And they love me even when I'm a frustrated, hot-tempered jerk (and I can be). And they love each other even when someone is being a drama queen or out-of-sorts for x, y, z reason (which is almost always). And, interestinly enough, while finding our children, we found an important part of ourselves.



We're not on a mission. We just found our kids.
And we are so blessed.

9 comments:

Lindsey said...

I appreciate this post so much! I love your honesty.

Julie Swenson said...

Amen!!! I find that I actually get irritated when people say "saintly" kinds of things about us. I just want to have all of my kids and go about my business. I don't like for my adopted kids to feel singled out like we have them just because we were being "nice". We have them because they are OURS!!!
Thanks for posting.

Single PAP said...

great post. everyone benefits with adoption.

jillybean1023 said...

Perfectly said!

HMK said...

I hear ya... thanks for saying what needs to be said!!! Sometimes well-intentioned people say some of the silliest things. (I'm being really nice with my wording, aren't I? ;) )

Jillienne said...

Great post

Emily B. said...

I love it! thanks for sharing (and now I'm going to steal that phrase and use it) ;)

Matthew and Amanda said...

Great post. Loved it.

lifeonplanetearth said...

Exactly!