Monday, November 26, 2007

Whose feeling lucky??

Sorry for being so quiet the last week or so (but making up for it now)! Busy at work, busy freaking out about all the stuff that needs to get done if we pass court on Friday (I mean when, when we pass court - sorry Mark!), etc.

Among the chaos, I've been thinking a lot. About a whole lotta things. And most of them will just have to wait for another post (assuming that I have time!) But there is one theme I wanted to write about.

When it comes up with people that we are adopting, we tend to get a variety of reactions. One that we get fairly regularly goes something like this "Oh, that is so great! Those kids are so lucky!" Which is a very nice thing to say. I like to think they mean that Mark and I are good people and good parents and that a child would be fairly lucky to be stuck with us as parents. However, some people say it and seem to be thinking that Hana and Abi are so lucky that we are rescuing them from Africa, bringing them to this great life in America.

This later view is the most problematic for me. Because in saying that, one is really saying, boy those kids sure are lucky to have their families torn from them by poverty and illness, to have been plucked from their home country, their culture, the only life they've ever known to move to the America (which is a pretty great place, but let's be honest - quite far from perfect in oh so many ways). I can't say that. I can't ever think that my kids are lucky to lose so much - more than I'll ever be able to comprehend.
But things are what they are. Luck has nothing to do with it. Unfortunately, my kids have already been pulled apart by horrors that I will never understand (though I will do my best to try to). If such things have to happen in our world, than I suppose Hana and Abi are lucky to still be able to experience the unwaivering love of a family, if not their first family.
But truly, we are the lucky ones. When I look back at this journey the past 7-9 months, I realize that I have already learned so much from my children. I have grown so much as a person from what they and their experiences have taught me. And I haven't even met them yet! I think about how much richer Grace's and Ally's life will be to have Hana and Abi as siblings. And I thank God every day for this most precious gift.

1 comment:

Amanda said...